Site Meter Toy Bender » Blog Archive » Best Game Idea For Children Ever: Suicide!

Best Game Idea For Children Ever: Suicide!

by

You know what kids don’t have enough of? Games that simulate suicide. That’s where the Asians have it right with this ad:

kidsrussian.jpg

That look on that young child? Oh yes, that’s pure excitement. You’re never going to get that kind of fun from games that don’t involve simulate taking your own life are you? The kid is so into this freaking toy that he looks like he just shat himself. Now, that’s an awesome toy. Hell, I bet that if you got a big group of kids together and had two of them facing off with this thing, then you could have one great pretend gambling den. Not that you’d want kids to pretend betting and murdering themselves, but you’ve got to train them somehow when they grow up and find themselves in an underground, secret Russian Roulette gambling ring. How will they know how how to place bets, how best to not crap themselves when holding a gun to your head, or how exactly they should lose their will to live. It’s also that very important time during adolescence where you must learn that you never want to bet on Christopher Walken. Di-di mau!

Liked this Post? Here’s the Best of Toybender:
Top Ten Weirdest Toy Ads
Eight (untrue) Facts about the Magic Eight Ball
Defending Toy Collecting

, , , , , ,

Did You Enjoy this Post? Subscribe to Toy Bender. It's Free!

One Response to “Best Game Idea For Children Ever: Suicide!”

  1. Great White Snark Says:

    Is he excited? I would have guessed, “first rectal exam.”

Leave a Reply


About Toy Bender

Welcome to Toy Bender, your source for maximum in-your-face to the extreme unleashed hardcore toy news and info. Toy Bender is updated at least five times a week with content so amazing that it could even give a woman a boner. Toy Bender covers both new and old toy lines, with a focus on anything that's totally radical. With all its mind blowing greatness, Toy Bender is your morning kick in the crotch of pure awesomicity

Toy Bender Author(s)

Blogging Flair

Crafts & Hobbies Channel Posts

  • Playing with Hearts
    Sometimes playing with hearts leads to playing with fire . . . Lessa writes about two (essentially) children who played with fire . . . which led to the inevitable result of a third life being [...]
  • Make your own Cranberry Body Polish
    What you will need: 1 cup purees cranberries 1 cup body lotion or carrier oil such as jojoba, olive or even grape seed oil 1 cup sugar-organic brown sugar without molasses or organic white [...]
  • Another heart pattern
    Yeah, I kind of got away from that, didn't I? I still have a few more to share with you, so will get another one here. This is for some of you . . . maybe not all. It is designed around a photo [...]
  • Tired Wrists
    I have been really pushing it - between Tuesday and Thursday this week I knit seven cloths! Yeah, that is a lot of knitting even by MY calculations. At this rate, I hope to have all 36 cloths for the [...]
  • Look Fabulous with Oraia
    Here at Wax and Bubbles I have been posting a lot of skin care products lately that can help restore and help balance out your skin's problem issues. The one thing I have found through all of these [...]
  • Try something from PCA Skin for Free
    PCA Skin is wanting your to try a free trail of their brightening therapy with TrueTone. The brightening therapy helps to correct hyper pigmentation and helps control your proper pigment in the [...]
  • Rhonda Allison Skin Peels
    Rhonda Allison's skin peels are peels that are actually reversing the signs of aging and showing the softer more elegant side of your skin. It's similar to peeling the skin from an apple and [...]
  • Soldering your stained glass project
    It's hard to believe but I'm nearly done with my stained glass project now. It's been a really great class that I've very much enjoyed. One more class and we'll be done! This past week we [...]
  • Pine Cone Bird Feeder
    February is Bird Feeder Month. Birds needs extra food this time of the year as they get ready for spring. There are always bird out on the lawn in the morning hours. So we know there are several [...]
  • Friday Roundy Uppy: Dinosaucers Should Be a Movie
    Item: Just to wrap things up, the contest winners of the Facebook/Comment contest have been notified. So sorry if you didn't win, hopefully I can give out free stuff soon. Seriously, it's like an [...]

Hot Off The Press