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DC Direct: Up-Armored Heroes

Friday, May 25th, 2007

DC Direct is making some cool superheroes in armor, because everyone knows that sometimes having crazy cool super powers just isn’t enough to take down the bad ass super villains. Regular Toy Bender readers know my obsession with Supergirl, so it won’t be a surprise that these figures jumped out at me:

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These armored up hotties are none other than Supergirl and Powergirl (who I also have an obsession for) in their superhero disguises from the Supergirl comics where they were freedom fighters in Candor. Normally I’d totally think that these were awesome, but in this case Supergirl abandoned everyone in Candor to an oppressive and tyrannical government just so she could figure out her past. Not her finest hour by any means, and one that I really don’t need to remember in toy form.

Source: Toy News International

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Keith Richards is a Pirate

Friday, May 25th, 2007

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Last week it was announced that there will be a Keith Richard’s toy made from the upcoming film Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End. One of the reasons why you might have not seen pirate Keith yet in any of the Pirate’s toy lines is that this figure is coming through courtesy of NECA, who has personal relationships with those in the music business. I guess that answers why they have so many figures of musicians then.

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New Sigma Six Figures

Tuesday, May 22nd, 2007

I’ve been a little lax in my Sigma Six news, because there hasn’t been anything that has really grabbed my attention… until now! Toy News International has a few pics of some new Sigma Six figures that you might want to check out. One figure that caught my eye in particular was Red Banshee, who is a transforming robot.

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If you’re a Joe purist (if there is such a thing) I don’t know if there’s room in the Joe universe for fully transforming robots if you discount the whole G.I. Joe v.s. Transformers thing. For me, it works for the more kid oriented Sigma Six line, but if this guy was somehow put into the world of A Real American Hero I might have a problem with it. Yes, I realize that there’s some crazy stuff in RAH like the crap from the G.I. Joe movie, Eco Warriors, and all of that. Still, a transforming robot seems just one step above and beyond the kind of technology level that I like to associate with G.I. Joe. I prefer a Joe universe where weapons and vehicles could almost exist, not one that’s completely based in science fiction.

God I’m a geek.

Source: Toy News International

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Master Replicas to no Longer Make Star Wars Products

Monday, May 21st, 2007

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I realize that this doesn’t necessarily fit under the umbrella of toys, but this should be of interest of any toy collector out there. It seems that Corgi International, the semi-new owners of Master Replicas has decided to drop the Star Wars License. If you do the math, that means the death of some awesome product lines.

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Toy Collecting is for Losers: A Different Perspective

Friday, May 18th, 2007

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While trolling Google to find if anything has said anything about me recently (hey, I’m a writer, it’s something we do), I found an interesting blog post that directly referenced Toy Bender. The post was titled “Why I Hate Toy Collectors and Toy Traffickers” so I had to bear down before I read it, because a name like that makes me think I might be going through the wringer like in high school gym class. Yep, believe it or not I wasn’t a big jock back in the old high school days! I was pleasantly surprised to discover that it wasn’t an all out attack on me or toy collectors in general. Instead, it was a well put together reason for why this person doesn’t like us. By the way, I have no idea who wrote this as there aren’t any bylines associated with any of the posts on the site.

From the site:

He recently posted an article called “Toy Collecting is for Losers: Defending Toy Collecting.� The article is about how toy collectors are not all like the 40 Year Old Virgin. Ok, that’s fine. I believe him even though ALL the toy collectors I have ever met are in fact freaks who do still live with their parents. However, given the size of the toy collecting industry I can believe that there are some socially, well-adjusted toy collectors.

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Toy Collecting is for Losers: …on second thought.

Friday, May 4th, 2007

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As a toy collector, I’ll admit there are a lot of my fellow collectors out there that drive me nuts. They really don’t anything to give the rest of us, or “the normals”, a good name. A friend of mine named Jacob shared this video with me, which is an example of toy collectors gone wrong:

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Toy Collecting is for Losers: Defending Toy Collecting

Friday, April 27th, 2007

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I’ve been thinking about writing an article about how toy collecting as a hobby is looked down upon by a large portion of society. Particularly, I was interested in getting the point of view of someone who thinks that there’s something wrong with toy collectors. The main problem with such an article was that I didn’t think I’d be able to find anyone who could give me this kind of unbiased opinion. It’s not like my friends and family are going to go on record to tell me that I’m an idiot. Maybe for other reasons, but not for toy collecting.

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Then my article “Why I am a Toy Collector� became a minor hit. It even made it to the front page of the social networking site Digg. For those of you who don’t know what that means, I got a lot of page views that I normally don’t get. Along with these page views I also got a few nasty comments directed at me on Digg itself. It seemed that I had discovered the the article I was looking for.

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Happy Easter!

Sunday, April 8th, 2007

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Okay, this is a little more Easter themed than War Dawgz videos I suppose. I’ve got to recognize Easter as it’s something my white bread ancestors celebrate with fervor and while I’m not home to be with them, I’m there in spirit. Still, that don’t get me extra helpings of ham.

If you’re a Christian then you’re hip to the whole Easter thing, i.e. you’re glad that Jesus rose from the dead to really give the devil a kick in his metaphysical sack. If you’re not a Christian, then you better hope to bloody Hell the Christians are wrong then right? Ha ha! Religious humor. To catch you up to speed, Christians love having pseudo-pagan rituals attached to their religious holidays, so there’s all this stuff about a bunny leaving baskets, eggs, and fake plastic grass that can never be completely cleaned up.

What does this have to do with toys you ask? Well, Easter is that time of year you get some toys that are neat, but they were never the kind you really wanted. You never get really good action figures or anything, just mostly Silly Putty and Slinkys. At least, that’s what most kids I know got. If you were the one kid that got Transformers and G.I. Joes for Easter, I’m going to go right on record here and saying I hated you. I don’t necessarily hate you now, but past Paul hates you. Hates you while he plays with his Slinky and Duncan Yo-Yo, you jerk.

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Star Wars Celebration Exclusive Figure Revealed… and a rant!

Friday, April 6th, 2007

The Star Wars figure exclusive was finally announced for the next Star Wars Celebration.

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Silver Surfer Limited Edition

Monday, March 12th, 2007

Marvelous News had an updated on a Hasbro limited edition Silver Surfer figure this last week. Normally, I’m excited about Silver Surfer toy news as I think he’s Airwolf, however this figure demonstrates what’s wrong with having too much articulation (besides looking like he’s squating in preperation for a cosmic dump).

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Possible New Lego Set in Germany?

Monday, February 5th, 2007

Over on the RebelScum.com forums, a user has posted a picture of a Lego TIE tank set with a Shadow Trooper mini-fig on display at the German toy fair.

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Now if this real, this marks a big step into the mucky suckitude of the Star Wars Expanded Universe. The TIE tank, or Crawler as it is officially known, has got to be one of the dumbest of all the E.U. vehicles. Really, how brilliant is it to have an assault vehicle with almost no armor and no rotating gun turret? The damn thing would have to have the pilot facing the enemy, which means he’d be completely exposed to enemy fire. Hell, he couldn’t even see anything besides what was in front of him. Those treads are so big and exposed that they are just asking for a Wookie with a wooden missile launcher to blow them apart. Don’t even get me started on the source of the TIE tank either, which is the comic book series Dark Empire that features Palpatine being resurrected as a clone. Talk about crapping on Vader’s triumph of redeeming himself by killing the old jerk in Jedi.

Please Lego, if you’re going to make this set then you owe Star Wars fans a TIE Phantom. Now that’s one hot looking TIE fighter variant.

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On Power Rangers and the March Towards Doom

Friday, January 26th, 2007

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In what may be the first time since its creation, the Power Rangers franchise is set to release a Toys R Us exclusive red Power Ranger pack that should appeal to Power Ranger collectors as it features several incarnations of the Red Ranger.

Normally, I don’t give two craps about the Power Rangers, however this bit of news has affected me in a very profound way, and it should for anyone over the age of twenty five. Think about it. There are kids out there old enough to get nostalgic about Power Rangers. It seems like just yesterday I was riding the bus to school and the little kids were wondering just who the Green Power Ranger was. At that time, I was an older nerd still wishing for the return of Star Wars figures and Power Rangers were a crappy and pale imitation of a real combining robot like Voltron.

This reminds me of the first time I realized I was aging. I was talking to a nineteen year old I worked with about Thundercats and he said he was too young to have seen the show. The very idea that there was an entire generation of kids that were old enough to be in college that had never experienced a “Thundercats Hooo!” in a first airing was a crushing blow.

I can see my future as a toy collector now. I’ll be going down aisle full of figures based off the latest crappy anime or manga and there will be tons of Power Rangers figures, while all of the toy lines I cherish will be gone and forgotten. I’ll be one of those stinky old men selling yellowed sci-fi magazines and tin robots at a comic book convention, except I’ll have copies of Star Wars Insider and clone figures that only other creepy old dudes will want.

Boy, the future looks grim indeed. At least I’ll have my cats named after Battlestar Galactica characters to keep me company.

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Someone Stole My Toys

Monday, January 22nd, 2007

I’ve been eagerly anticipating the arrival of the Republic Commando pack like a prisoner awaiting a conjugal visit. After all, I had pre-ordered them way back in August. When I finally received notice that it was headed my way, I was elated. I too would have my very own internet exclusive seven pack of clone goodness like all the other lucky Star Wars toy collectors out there who ordered theirs.

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As you may have inferred from the title of this post, it didn’t happen.

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McFarlane Toys Update: 24 “Action” Figures

Saturday, January 13th, 2007

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It seems like nobody but Mr. Todd McFarlane can heat up the mainstream press with some good old toy excitement. First it was the completely useless Lost inaction figures and now it’s “action” figures based on the hit show 24.

Where the Lost figures cover your burning need for a fat guy that just stands around being fat and a chick laying around in a bikini, the concept behind 24 figures make a little more sense to me as they aren’t just regular people. Jack Bauer is more in the hero lot like a modern James Bond as opposed to being a guy who happens to be, well lost.

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Still, I’m not sure if this Jack Bauer figure can still be classified as an honest to goodness toy, as he features what looks like zero points of articulation. To me, this is more along the lines of a plastic Jack Bauer statue. What’s the real difference between this and any Gentle Giant statue? McFarlane nuts, feel free to ridicule and fling poo at me. I’d like to hear what you think of these figures that barely qualify as toys.

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Steve Irwin Toy: Is it too soon?

Friday, December 29th, 2006

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It looks like Steve Irwin is to make a return in toy form. This isn’t some slimy company trying to cash in on the wildlife TV host either; it was made with the approval of Irwin’s family. While this isn’t the first time that Irwin has appeared as a toy, it is the first time his image has been placed on a toy since his rather tragic yet not entirely unexpected death.

Is this a little too soon for anyone? South Park already went into the tasteless territory (as they are want to do) with Irwin, but somehow this is a little different. To me it’s a little creepy, well not as creepy as this image:

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Hell, even the old toy line seems somehow morbid now that I look at them.

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I’m not in the belief that Mr. Irwin was a hero, like the author of the story I linked to. Our definition of hero has gotten a little loose over the years. Irwin was a man who stuck his face in front of dangerous animals for almost no reason other than he was insane. Maybe he helped to us learn more about wildlife, but we all watched the show because we thought he was crazy. Still, he seemed like a likable fellow so it’s a bit odd to see his face plastered on a stuffed toy. For me, it is a bit too early to see the crazy Aussie like this. Just look at the image on that doll at the top of this post. It gives me the creeps.

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